The approach of prayer
“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened. Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!” (Mt. 7:7-11.)
Do you struggle with knowing how to approach God in prayer? Like, what can I really ask God for, and what can I expect from Him? Can I ask Him for anything I want, or just certain things? Do I have to qualify everything with saying “Thy will be done?” These are common questions, aren’t they? As a pastor I find that people struggle with this more often then they admit. OK fine, I struggle with it.
So, how does Jesus help us? Well, what Jesus teaches and demonstrates is that prayer is not so much about categories of acceptable or unacceptable, but more a matter of living in the fullness of our relationship with God. Perhaps this sounds obvious, but if someone were to observe how you pray, what kind of relationship with God would they think you have?
It seems that we are tempted with two equal and opposite errors when approaching God:
The first error is approaching God with a sense of entitlement. It goes without saying that prayer is not a way for us to get God to do whatever we want. If that were the case, we would be in a lot of trouble, wouldn’t you agree? Think about it, this means that God would have to fulfill the prayers of all those Bronco fans asking for Denver to win the Super Bowl. That obviously didn’t happen, and what a tragedy it would be! All kidding aside, our world would be a mess if God gave us everything we want, or think we need, and our character and attitudes would be even worse. Furthermore, entitlement in any relationship is unhealthy. If you are a parent, you know that when you see entitlement in your children, something is wrong in the dynamics of the relationship. You seek to reform it.
A second error we easily fall into might be considered embarrassment. For some of us, instead of struggling with entitlement, we feel embarrassed when approaching God and asking Him for what is on our heart. We don’t want to trouble or burden Him; we don’t want to feel desperate or needy. This pitfall is tricky, because it can come off as pious, or humble, but it is neither. If anything, it is further evidence that we lack an understanding of who we are in Christ and the kind of relationship God has made available to us.
So how should we approach God? Well, maybe we need to change the question. Let’s answer this question: How does God approach us? The best news in the entire world (which should inform our prayer life more than anything else) is that for those of us who are in Christ, God sees us as dearly loved children. This impacts everything. Because of God’s approach to us, we can then come to him not with entitlement, or embarrassment, but with bold expectation. Expectation that He hears our every word, He knows what’s always best, and He’s on it, He cares! He’s our perfect Dad! This is why Jesus taught His disciples to start their prayers with “Our Father”. So regardless of whether or not we are asking properly or perfectly, we can always approach God as dearly loved children.
At Central Community, we are together asking God for some very big things: A place to meet, leaders to be raised up, lost to be found, the city of Seattle to be transformed, the list goes on and on. This isn’t because we feel like God owes us, or because we think we know what’s best all the time—after all, we’re just kids right? We are asking because He’s our perfect Dad, and we are cool with Him deciding what is best in the end. So we will keep approaching Him with bold expectation.
– Written by Jeff Neuenschwander